According to Zeke

words and music by Howard Kranz

One dark night on the ninth moon of Saturn, twelve men

were sitting around a campfire. One said, “Zeke, tell us a story. Tell us the story of the beginning. Tell us the story of the ending. Tell us the story of the beginning and of the ending, and of the difficult part.” And Zeke began, thus:

In the beginning, everything existed at once. It was a

Great Cacophony. God loved it. God loved it, but the

individual souls began to whine: “It’s so noisy here.”

“We can’t hear ourselves.” “We don’t get it.”

So, in her infinite mercy, God did a wonderful thing.

He created a new context, a context in which everything

could be strung out and examined separately. It was a

Lesser Cacophony. God loved it, not for its intrinsic merit

which was inferior to the Great Cacophony, but God loved

it because the individual souls loved it, and even though

the individual souls had fucked up the Great Cacophony

with their incessant petty whining, God loved the individual souls. Even worse, God liked the individual souls. Secretly, God even liked the way the individual souls fucked up the Great Cacophony with their incessant petty whining. It was the best part of the Great Cacophony, the whining of the individual souls.

So, because God loved the whining individual souls,

God spoiled them rotten by creating a new context,

a context in which everything could be strung out and

examined separately. This context is known as time,

and the strung-out Great Cacophony is referred to as

the universe. We know that this is true, because Zeke

said so.